The smartest move in the history of mankind

So, I've been in Texas for around 2.5 years now, and was still on my Wisconsin driver's license. What can I say, I'm a procrastinator like that, and don't have a history of being pulled over, so I never really consider it that big of a deal. The WI license was valid until 2012, and I was fully prepared to still be on it when I moved back up to WI, hopefully later this year.

Unfortunately, on my recent trip out to Florida, then to Houston, my driver's license was lost. When I go through security at the airport, I like to empty my pockets completely, into the small pouch of my usual carry-on backpack, and only carry my driver's license and boarding pass through the metal detector. It expedites the process and makes me perhaps not a pro, but at least a top-seeded amateur, when it comes to getting through airport security.

However, on this particular trip, for some reason I forgot to switch my license back into my wallet, and therefore kept it in the front pocket of my khaki pants. You can see where this is going. It fell out. I've conceded that it is lost forever, probably in the hands of some geeky-looking 18 year old that is using it to buy beer.

That wasn't the smartest move in the history of mankind to which my post ever-so-sarcastically refers. The smartest move in the history of mankind comes in my efforts to get my TX driver's licence to replace it.

Okay, so I had prepared by studying online exactly what documentation is required in TX to get my licence. I have decided that this is roughly equivalent to the documentation required to buy a multinational corporation, or to marry Donald Trump. Regardless, I was determined, and gathered the requisite paperwork:

1) Iron-clad proof of my identity, either a birth certificate + gov't issue photo id, or a valid US Passport. Check. I have the latter, the passport I applied for back when I was 19 and went with my parents and sister-in-law to the British Virgin Islands. It's old, but passports are good for 10 years, so it was still valid.

2) Social Security card. Check.

3) Documentation proving financial responsibility for my vehicle. Check. I have the title application receipt.

4) Proof of TX insurance. Check. I keep this in my car, of course.

I felt prepared, and indeed, that aspect of the license application proved to be without travail. The only fly in the ointment was, the fact that I didn't have a driver's license on me, which made me afraid that I would have to take the test, both written and driving. I had yesterday off, so I was prepared to make a day of it, but that did present the dilemma of, how to get to the DMV place. Understand that we don't have a proper DMV like most actual cities; we have a tiny corner office that is shared with the state patrol office, where one clerk handles everything, and takes 11:00 thru 12:30 off every day for lunch.

Now, what I was thinking was, do I really want to be DRIVING into the parking lot of this tiny office, which is shared with the state patrol office, and saying to the clerk, "Hi, I don't have a driver's license!"? That didn't seem appealing. Particularly if I had to take the driving test, and we were to want to use my car, at which point, I would point out, "yes, I drove here, but I am not legally actually allowed to drive at the moment because I don't have an actual driver's license on me". That didn't seem smart. I needed an alternative.

This is what led to the smartest move in the history of mankind.

I walked. Hey, I need the exercise anyway, and how hard could it be? It was just walking!

Not realizing of course that it was a full five miles, each way. Ouch.

Now, I'm way out of shape, but I can still handle going ten miles in a single day, at least as far as endurance is concerned. The problem came when I decided to wear my tennis shoes, which I have since decided, are not fitting me so well any more. So by the time I made it there, I was thinking, "Omigod my feet hurt!"

Getting the license itself proved not to be a problem in the least. The clerk was able to pull up my WI information and I didn't have to take any tests at all, just fill out some forms, and solemnly swear that my WI license was lost, and that I hadn't given it to a geeky-looking underaged buddy to use to go and buy beer (even though that's probably what it is being used for, it really is lost).

On the way back, all I could keep repeating to myself was "Great idea man, really brilliant. Why couldn't you have driven to the Subway across the street, parked there, and walked over to the DMV office from there?! You would be home by now, and playing video games!"

I wasn't so much exhausted when I made it home, though I had worked up a bit of a sweat, as I was in *pain*. My feet were throbbing like you don't know what. I pulled off my shoes with relief, and pulled off my socks with trepidation, worried at how bad the sight was going to be.

It was bad. The backs of both of my heels had massive blisters that had already popped, causing much pain in my achilles area (my right heel actually had two blisters, fraternal twins, each close to a nickel in size). There are random blisters spread around on areas of my sole, and the "ring toe" of each foot is pretty bad. The left foot's "ring toe" in particular is basically one giant blister. My socks were soaked with the pus. It was nasty, nasty, nasty.

I collapsed in bed not long after. I didn't even have the willpower to get up and eat dinner, so I wound up going without. Needless to say, I was not quite prepared for my little impromptu 10 mile walk.

Today I had to come into work, so I've been limping around, in more or less constant pain. This crap might be funny, but it sure isn't fun.

Smartest decision EVER...